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Part of the Premarital Counseling Series: Building Covenant Through Relational Integrity — Course 4 of 10

Premarital Counseling Series — Course 4

Core Section — Building Covenant

Communication, Conflict Resolution, and Emotional Regulation

Building Covenant Through Relational Integrity

The communication and conflict skills that determine whether a marriage grows stronger through hard seasons — or quietly erodes under them.

6 Modules Self-Paced Dual Sign-In Included Biblically Grounded
Premarital Series · Course 4
$199

Coming Soon · Introductory course available now

Coming Soon

Enrollment for this in-depth series course is not open yet. Start with the introductory course for current enrollment.

✓ 6 in-depth communication modules
✓ Biblical integration every module
✓ Dual access for both partners
✓ The Four Horsemen assessment
✓ Couple communication-culture framework

Course Objectives

What You Will Build Together

1
Identify communication styles — passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive, assertive — and their cost
2
Learn to recognize and regulate nervous-system flooding, shutdown, and stonewalling
3
Reframe conflict from threat to information about unmet needs and fears
4
Recognize the Four Horsemen — criticism, contempt, defensiveness, stonewalling — and their antidotes
5
Practice the repair process — from acknowledgment to accountability to reconnection
6
Build shared, agreed-upon norms for how your marriage will handle hard conversations

Biblical Foundation

Scripture That Anchors This Course

This course is built on the biblical call to speak truth in love, and to let no conflict go unaddressed past the day it happened.

Ephesians 4:26

"In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry." — The biblical mandate for timely, honest repair.

Proverbs 15:1

"A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." — De-escalation as a spiritual and relational practice.

James 1:19

"Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry." — The posture underneath every healthy conflict conversation.

Dr. Donetta Quinones

Your Instructor

Dr. Donetta Quinones

Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) · Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC)

Dr. Quinones brings over 20 years of clinical experience spanning jail cells, rehab centers, and private practice. A Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) and Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC) with a PhD in Psychology, graduate training in forensic psychology, and certification as a Human Behavior Consultant, she integrates trauma science with biblical truth throughout her teaching and curriculum development. She holds tri-state licensure and has spent her career sitting with the most broken relationships — and watching them heal.

PhD in Psychology · MA, Forensic Psychology PhD · LPC · LMHC Program Development Certified Human Behavior Consultant

Course Curriculum

6 Modules — From Conflict Patterns to Repair Culture

Each module builds the communication and conflict skills that determine whether hard seasons strengthen or erode a marriage.

1

Module 1

Communication Styles and Their Relational Impact

Passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive, and assertive communication — how each style developed, how it lands on a partner, and what it costs the relationship over time.

Key Topics
  • Passive/aggressive/passive-aggressive/assertive styles
  • How styles develop
  • Impact on a partner
  • Long-term relational cost
Biblical Integration
  • James 1:19 — quick to listen, slow to speak
  • Proverbs 18:13 — answering before listening is folly
2

Module 2

Emotional Regulation in Conflict

How the nervous system hijacks communication during conflict — flooding, shutdown, stonewalling. Practical regulation tools that allow couples to stay present and productive during hard conversations.

Key Topics
  • Nervous system flooding
  • Shutdown & stonewalling
  • Regulation tools
  • Staying present in conflict
Biblical Integration
  • Proverbs 15:1 — a gentle answer turns away wrath
  • Philippians 4:6-7 — the peace of God guards your heart
3

Module 3

Conflict as Information

Reframing conflict from threat to data. What couples are actually fighting about beneath the surface argument — unmet needs, attachment fears, value differences, and grief.

Key Topics
  • Conflict as data, not threat
  • Unmet needs beneath the argument
  • Attachment fears
  • Value differences & grief
Biblical Integration
  • Proverbs 20:5 — the purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters
  • Psalm 139:23-24 — search me and know my heart
4

Module 4

The Four Horsemen and Their Antidotes

Based on Gottman research — criticism, contempt, defensiveness, stonewalling and their specific antidotes. How to identify these patterns in your own communication and interrupt them before they become habitual.

Key Topics
  • Criticism & its antidote
  • Contempt & its antidote
  • Defensiveness & its antidote
  • Stonewalling & its antidote
Biblical Integration
  • Ephesians 4:31-32 — get rid of bitterness, be kind and forgiving
  • Colossians 3:13 — bear with each other and forgive
5

Module 5

Repair: How to Come Back From Conflict Well

The repair process — from rupture acknowledgment to accountability to reconnection. What a healthy apology includes, what it does not include, and why couples who repair well grow closer through conflict.

Key Topics
  • Rupture acknowledgment
  • Accountability practice
  • Healthy apology structure
  • Reconnection after conflict
Biblical Integration
  • Ephesians 4:26 — do not let the sun go down on your anger
  • Matthew 5:23-24 — first be reconciled, then offer your gift
6

Module 6

Building a Communication Culture for Your Marriage

Couple-level norms for difficult conversations — agreed-upon practices, shared language, and the structures that make it safer to say hard things. Creating the communication environment your marriage will need.

Key Topics
  • Couple-level communication norms
  • Shared language for hard topics
  • Safety structures
  • Long-term communication culture
Biblical Integration
  • Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 — two are better than one
  • Romans 12:18 — as far as it depends on you, live at peace

Who This Course Is For

Built for Couples Ready to Fight Fair — and Repair Well

This course is for engaged or seriously committed couples who want real, research-informed skills for communication and conflict before hard seasons arrive.

💍

Engaged Couples

Preparing for marriage and wanting a shared toolkit for hard conversations before the wedding, not after the first real fight.

🗣️

Couples Who Communicate Differently

Partners with different conflict styles — one who withdraws, one who pursues — who want a shared framework.

⛪

Faith-Based Couples

Couples who want conflict repair grounded in biblical reconciliation, not just secular communication technique.

🔁

Couples Who Fight the Same Fight

Partners who notice the same argument resurfacing and want to understand what’s really underneath it.

Conflict Is Inevitable. Damage Isn’t.

Every marriage has conflict. What determines the outcome isn’t whether you fight — it’s whether you know how to repair. This course builds that skill before you need it most.

$199
Courses 1-10 Coming Soon · Introductory course available now
Coming Soon

In-depth series enrollment is coming soon

Program Clarity

GraceRoot courses are psychoeducational learning programs, not emergency care, legal advice, or a replacement for therapy. Certificates document GraceRoot completion. Court, employer, board, or continuing education acceptance should be confirmed before purchase unless a page states a specific approval.

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